


To be Honest

by islasands



Series: Lambski [5]
Category: Adam Lambert (Musician)
Genre: Conflict, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-01
Updated: 2011-09-01
Packaged: 2017-10-23 07:46:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/247896
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/islasands/pseuds/islasands
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Adam is such a stroppy, condescending bastard sometimes. It pisses Sauli off. But to be honest, he himself is no angel...</p>
            </blockquote>





	To be Honest

Sauli slowed down to a walk. His plan had been to run his irritable feelings out of him but his heart wasn’t in it. He not only wanted to hold onto those feelings but he wanted to express them. That bastard. That condescending, ill-tempered bastard. It was fine for him to lose it whenever he felt like it but not for anyone else. He could give it but he couldn’t take it.

“So. I have flaws. What did you expect? We’ve all got them. You’ve got them. Not many, I’ll grant you, but –"

Sauli had butted in. “Floors?”

“Flaws. Failings. Weaknesses.”

Sauli could see Adam’s anger was ready to subside. He knew Adam was acutely sensitive to the language barrier between them. In fact, judging by the way he was now frowning at the floor, with his lips pushed out, it would be a piece of cake to bring him back to heel. But that was part of the problem. Adam always had an out. He’d come out guns blazing and then slink off, damage done, sorrowful because of Sauli’s ‘fish out of water’ status.

Sauli paused to take stock of the view, if you could call houses on a hillside a view. If he was honest, he didn’t like looking at views. He preferred being in them. A wave of homesickness suddenly brought tears to his eyes. Not for his home. Not for places. Not even faces when he thought about it. He missed his physical life. He missed not knowing he was in his body because he was too busy being in it. He missed living his life by accident. He just wasn’t, by nature, introspective. His thoughts surfaced when he was moving, not when he was still. Even moving in a car helped to free his thoughts and loosen his tongue. He wished he could explain that to Adam. That he wasn’t conflict shy at all. He just hated arguing when he felt as though they were standing, chest high, in a stagnant pool.

But to be honest, he also was lazy. He preferred to shrug rather hunch his shoulders. And he preferred to laugh even when being serious was more appropriate. Especially then. To be honest.

And while he was on this honest kick, he had known perfectly well what the word “flaws” meant.

Sauli resumed walking. He wanted to finish the circuit he had planned but even more he wanted to turn back. He had a brilliant plan. He would explain his difficulties to Adam, and ask if during future fights they could physically fight. Preferably in the shower.

With shitloads of lube.

He reached the top of the hill. There were at least two left miles to go if he continued. To be honest, he thought to himself, I can’t be fucked. He began sprinting back down the hill. He didn’t want to be fit or healthy or happy or clever or understood. He wanted to go home.

And like it or not, home was where-ever that bastard was.


End file.
